Trying to think of something clever, I turned to today's date in my 11th grade journal. Man, I hated high school so much. I hated every single day from 9th-12th. So many people reflect on those as the best days of their lives. Ef that. Each day was pure torture.
It's funny because reading this entry sorta reminds me of how I now feel about work sometimes.
Monday, January 16, 1989
"I detest these nights before school after a relaxing three-day weekend. I just hate having to get back into the swing of things!
My homework was hardly good enough to be called "done." I didn't even call Scott.
I don't want to go to school. I wish so badly that I could skip college. I just don't want to go! [I ended up loving college.] If it were up to me I wouldn't go!
It's so late. I hate the thought of 7:00 AM. I dread opening my eyes. Just having to open my closet, turn on the radio and get ready for a long day of school complete with facing gym (more about that here) and facing assholes like that bitch Amy [no idea who this is] ... the other day we had to work "in twos" in American History and she refused to work with me. I wish she were dead. I hate her. I don't want to go tomorrow. Plus I hope it snows on Wednesday or Thursday night. If it does, then I hope it snows enough to close school - otherwise who needs it?!
If it snows, then I'll probably have to spend the day babysitting at Lenore's which sucks. I won't get anything done and can't sleep late.
Things I live for: sleep, phone, writing, TV, music, vacation, movies, reading, clothes
I hate school, I can't take the pressure."
Ugh, reading that journal entry really bummed me out. Just a reminder I guess. It sucks how youth is wasted on feeling bad. I wish I could have been a different person back then. Why didn't I say something? I should have punched that Amy bitch out or said, "Guess what dumb ass, I don't want to work with your dumb ass either!" Instead I kept quiet and just wrote it down hours later.