Wednesday, January 30, 2008

The Mickey Mouse House

Not too far from our apartment, there's a huge odd-shaped house. It's white with Kelly green trim and shutters with a red front door. Something about this house is just different. It's three stories high which is kinda high compared to the homes in the 'hood. Through the second floor windows-on a rare day when the blids are open-you can't help but notice the faces of Disney characters staring back at you. It's a tad creepy.

It makes you wonder ... Who lives there??? Although I've never seen a woman coming or going, I have witnessed a man that looks similar to one of the Seven Dwarves, only not as short, on the grounds. He has two PT Cruisers that never leave his green garage. One is white (it looks like some sort of special edition) and the other is maroon. I noticed the white one is wrapped in a clear plastic bag - cheap plastic, like the type your dry cleaning comes in.

A few months ago, I noticed the green blinds were open, giving me a pretty decent view inside the mysterious home. I couldn't help but laugh when I saw two 3 foot tall Mickey and Minnie Mouse figures perfectly posed near the windows. I couldn't wait to tell Drew. He's the only one who knows the house exists.

Every day, I feel the need to gawk at this house - I've passed it on my way to work every single day for four years now. I'm always looking to see if something weird is going on, or if the homeowner will be out watering the grass (he never is). I was surprised last week when some men were working on the driveway.

I thought this was kind of funny since it seems as if nobody ever drives in or out of this house. The next few mornings I made sure to glare to my right while traveling down this particular street hoping to catch a glimpse. It looked very specific and detailed. A week later, it appeared. Gone was the blacktop which happened to be in decent condition. In its place? A new dark green stone driveway with a HUGE image of a white outlined Mickey Mouse head smack dab in the center.

Last night, on our way home from dinner, I pointed it out to Andrew as we passed their house and he gasped and giggled about how unique the guy is. Drew replied, "I hope that guy's married, because he's so strange, what lady would want to date him?" I thought to myself. Disney isn't even really that cool - like at least if it were Hello Kitty, I'd probably have to dump Drew and meet this off-beat character!

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

Valentine's Day Horror Stories

I just sent this off to a columnist looking for funny Valentine's Day stories. This is one that happened to me...

Six years ago, I met my fiancé on an online dating Web site. After about six months, we became very close via the phone, email and text message and were preparing to meet the day after Valentine's Day -- it happened to fall on a Friday that year.

As Valentine's Day neared, he asked me for my work address. Excited, thinking he was going to order me some flowers, I quickly called my favorite mail order cookie company and sent him a huge box filled with heart-shaped cookies and other treats.

When February 14 rolled around, I watched as my coworkers' roses arrived, one after another. Anxiously I awaited for my special delivery. Would they be in a box or vase? Would they be attached to a balloon or a bear? While lost in a moment, dreaming of fragrant floral images, I was "awakened" by our company mailroom guy. No, my admirer didn't send me flowers, he sent me what felt like a book. "Hmm," I thought, maybe it's a romantic book of some sort? After I unwrapped it, my mouth dropped. It was as if someone played a cruel joke on me.

He did indeed send me a book. No it wasn't a book of love poems or anything remotely romantic... it was some goofy boyish trivia book marketed as "bathroom reading" - the front cover featured a large photo of a toilet paper roll. Inside, the inscription said something like, "You won't believe the things you'll learn from this book. I enjoyed it and now I'm passing it on to you. Happy Valentine's Day!" The next year I received a day of beauty and a dozen roses... So yeah, we're getting married in November of this year... 


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