I'm doing some research on Twilight actor Taylor Lautner (more on that another day) and discovered he is slated to portray Stretch Armstrong in a 2012 3-D movie. Wow, what a blast from the past. "Who the heck is Stretch Armstrong?" you young folks are saying... Check it out!
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| Stretch Monster in all his glory! |
Stretch Armstrong Doll From Kenner
In 1976, Kenner released the most ridiculous, yet awesome, over-sized action figure doll targeted to boys. Stretch Armstrong was a tough muscle head guy sporting only a Speedo. He consisted of thick rubber filled with a heavy gel that made him, well, stretch. You could pull on his arms and legs, make them super long, tie him to a chair with his arms or and wrap him in a ball. I liked the way you could play tug-of-war with him and a friend. Still confused? Think macho, flesh-colored Gumby... It was very odd, yet very entertaining at the same time.I don't know why I remember this toy. My brother was born that year, so I doubt he had one and we didn't have any cousins at that point. I'm guessing sons of my parents friends had Stretch Armstrong because I remember the distinct plastic rubbery scent and the way the rubber felt. Hmm. I think I even bit Stretch at one point to see what it felt like. I was simply mesmerized by Stretch Armstrong. I truly was.
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| Gross Stretch X-Ray action figure doll. |
Then there was his enemy, Stretch Monster. Stretch Monster was a freakish looking green scaly creature released in 1978 while Stretch Ollie, a blue male octopus and Stretch Olivia, a pink octopus soon joined the Stretch crew. Stretch X-Ray was another ghastly creature which resembled a big-brained alien with a transparent body giving kids a sneak peek at his organs. GROSS!
Anyway, the point of this post is that for some reason the thought of Taylor Lautner staring in a 3-D film about Stretch Armstrong, makes me giggle. Anyone?
Please view the Stretch Monster vs. Stretch Armstrong commercial. You've gotta see it! It's from the 1970s and looks so low-budget. It's awesome! It's crazy because I remember that last line the kid yells out, "We'll meet again SHORTEEEEE" ... I remember it because it made me roll around the floor laughing. I was that kind of kid.
